Lazy Fat Chick

Zoo Visit Part 7 (35 Photos) - LAST

2008-11-25T00:11:00.002+08:00

For Details: Click Here.

Zoo Visit Part 6 (44 Photos)

2008-11-10T01:40:00.001+08:00

For Details: Click Here.

Zoo Visit Part 5 (38 Photos)

2008-11-08T04:12:00.001+08:00

For Details: Click Here.

Zoo Visit Part 4 (49 Photos)

2008-11-04T13:55:00.001+08:00

For Details: Click Here.

Zoo Visit Part 3 (49 Photos)

2008-11-04T00:45:00.001+08:00

For story: click Here.

Zoo Visit Part 2 (26 Photos)

2008-11-03T18:26:00.002+08:00

For Details: click Here.

Zoo Visit Part 1 (Camwhore)

2008-11-03T15:47:00.001+08:00

For details, click here.

Just take care of my eyes please...

2008-09-04T10:15:00.000+08:00

Click to read.

Wonders of Makeup.

2008-07-22T22:29:00.000+08:00

Some pre-Makeup and after Makeup photos.

All images taken from :
http://www.sankakucomplex.com/2008/06/20/makeup-comparisons-before-after/

China Earthquake Comic Strips by Coco Wang

2008-07-02T01:40:00.000+08:00

CHINA EARTHQUAKE STRIPS

Hello. This is Coco Wang.

As you know the breaking news of 5.12 Earthquake in China, almost all the TV channels in China are broadcasting 24 hours non-stop of every development and stories of all the rescue operations in all damaged locations.

I don't know how much information the BBC or any UK media received from us, I imagine the UK audiences were presented with the major developments of the incident, but you are probably unaware of many important and inside details which are only known to people inside China.

The amount of incredibly moving stories of victims, rescuers, and volunteers is simply shocking at the moment. I have been collecting newspapers of all the stories, and telling them in the form of comic strips. I hope these stories could show the UK readers the love, warmth and courage of the Chinese people, also the sad and cruel reality of the horrible 5.12 Earthquake.

I am back home in Beijing now. Thousands of heart-breaking stories are happening 24 hours non-stop everyday, some are so sad that you can hardly bear, some are incredibly moving that you just can't stop crying... I wanted to go to the front to help with all those people, some of my friends have already gone there, but I heard that the traffic needed to be kept totally clear for rescue transportation at the moment, people like me without knowledge of first-aid and experience of rescue operations going there now would cause choas and trouble... but I can't just sit at home and do nothing, I have been crying my eyes out in the past three days, I have never felt more proud of my country and people... their love, courage and kindness rock me to my core! I have decided to tell these touching stories by drawing comics. I am going to send you comic strips almost everyday from now on, I hope you could know something about the earthquake in China, although you don't have to do anything, but I hope you could feel our love and hope.

Thank you all so much.

Coco Wang

20th Birthday Cake

2008-05-11T11:40:00.002+08:00

Jail or Work? (Chinese)

2008-05-09T00:40:00.001+08:00

Why does being jailed sounds so much more fun?
hahas.

Game: Candybar4 DollMakerGirl by elouai.com

2008-04-21T03:30:00.000+08:00

http://elouai.com/candybar4/dollmakergirl.php

I MADE ALL THESE FOR MY FRIEND!!! :)

Soup Restaurant at Jurong Point

2008-01-06T13:30:00.000+08:00

Christmas Display @ Parkway

2008-01-06T13:05:00.000+08:00

The Tree

ahh.. snowman-devilhornnose-family!!!

Season Greetings :)

Christmas Tree @ Vivocity

2008-01-06T12:50:00.000+08:00

Singapore Police Force Recruitment Campaign 2008 at Vivocity

2008-01-06T10:51:00.000+08:00

小学生造句

2007-10-16T19:15:00.000+08:00

1.题目 : 原来
小朋友写 : 原来他是我爸爸。
老师评语 : 妈妈关切一下

2. 题目: ..一边 ...........一边 ............ ..
小朋友写: 他一边脱衣服,一边穿裤子 .
老师评语: 他到底要脱还是要穿啊~~

3. 题目: 其中
小朋友写: 我的其中一只左脚受伤了。
老师评语: 你是蜈蚣？ ~~

4.题目 : 一 ...就....
小朋友写: 一只娃娃就要一百块。
老师评语: 老师笑到不行 ..

5.題目 : 你看
小朋友写 : 你看什么看 ! 没看过啊

6. 照样造句
例题: 你(唱歌 ) 我( 跳舞)
小朋友写 : 你( 好吗) ! 我 (很好)
老师评语: 你在写英文翻译吗 ??

7.照样造句
例题: 别人都夸我 ( )，其实我 ( )
小朋友写: 别人都夸我( 很帅 )，其实我 ( 是戴面具的 ) 。
老师评语: 什么面具这么好用 ???

8. 题目: 好 ... 又好 ..
小朋友写: 妈妈的腿 ,好细又好粗 ...
老师评语: 那到底是细还是粗？

9.题目 : 陆陆续续
小朋友写 : 下班了，爸爸陆陆续续的回来。
老师评语 : 你到底有几个爸爸呀?

10.题目: 皮开肉绽
小朋友写: 停电的夜晚，到处很黑，我吓得皮开肉绽!
老师评语 : 看到这句... 老师佩服你。

11.题目 : 欣欣向荣- 比喻生长美好的样子。
小朋友写: 我的弟弟长得欣欣向荣。
老师评语: 孩子，你弟弟是植物人吗...

还有一个更瞎的 …
小朋友写: 欣欣向荣荣告白。
老师评语: 连续剧不要看太多 ~~

12. 题目: 谢谢 ....因为 ......
小朋友写: 我要谢谢妈妈 ,因为她每天都帮我写作业 ......
老师评语: 原来你的作业是妈妈写的!!!!!!!

13. 题目: 难过
小朋友写: 我家门前有条水沟很难过。
老师评语: 老师更难过 ......

14. 题目: 天才
小朋友写: 我３天才洗一次澡。
老师评语: 要每天洗才干净 ~~

15.題目 : 一 …便…
小朋友写 : 我一走出门，对面就是便利商店。

还有一個更瞎的 …
小朋友写 : 哥哥一吃完饭，就大便。
老师评语 : 造句不要乱造...

16. 題目: 又 .....又 .....
小朋友寫: 我的妈妈又矮又高又瘦又肥。
老师评语: 你妈妈......是怪物吗 ?

17. 果然
上课小朋友说：昨天我吃了水果，然后又喝了凉水
老师：这是词组，不能分开造句。

18. 瓜分
小朋友：大傻瓜分不清是非
老师：小傻瓜也分不清

19. 好吃
小朋友：好吃个屁
老师：………

20. 况且
小朋友：一辆火车经过，况且况且况且况且．．．．．
老师： ……………

THE BEAUTY OF MATHS.

2007-10-02T00:05:00.000+08:00

1 x 8 + 1 = 9
12 x 8 + 2 = 98
123 x 8 + 3 = 987
1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876
12345 x 8 + 5 = 98765
123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654
1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543
12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432
123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321

1 x 9 + 2 = 11
12 x 9 + 3 = 111
123 x 9 + 4 = 1111
1234 x 9 + 5 = 11111
12345 x 9 + 6 = 111111
123456 x 9 + 7 = 1111111
1234567 x 9 + 8 = 11111111
12345678 x 9 + 9 = 111111111
123456789 x 9 +10= 1111111111

9 x 9 + 7 = 88
98 x 9 + 6 = 888
987 x 9 + 5 = 8888
9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888
98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888
987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888
9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888
98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888

Brilliant, isn't it?

And look at this symmetry:

1 x 1 = 1
11 x 11 = 121
111 x 111 = 12321
1111 x 1111 = 1234321
11111 x 11111 = 123454321
111111 x 111111 = 12345654321
1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321
11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321
111111111 x 111111111= 12345678987654321

Now, take a look at this...

101%

From a strictly mathematical viewpoint:

What Equals 100%? What does it mean to give MORE
than 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are
giving more than 100%?

We have all been in situations where someone wants
you to GIVE OVER 100%.

How about ACHIEVING 101%?

What equals 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help
answer these questions:

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Is represented as:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

If:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R- K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

And:

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But:

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

THEN, look how far the love of God will take you:

L-O-V-E-O-F-G-O-D
12+15+22+5+15+6+7+15+4 = 101%

Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical
certainty that:

While Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close,
and Attitude will get you there, It's the Love of God that will put
you over the top!

It's up to you if you share this with your friends &
loved ones just the way I did.

Game of Intelligence

2007-09-09T18:30:00.000+08:00

There was a blonde who found herself sitting next to a Lawyer on an airplane. The lawyer just kept bugging the blonde wanting her to play a game of intelligence. Finally, the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds, and said every time the blonde could not answer one of his questions, she owed him $5.00, but every time he could not answer hers, he'd give her $50.00. The lawyer figured he could not lose, and the blonde reluctantly accepted.

The lawyer first asked, "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?"

Without saying a word the blonde handed him $5.00. then the blonde asked, "What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?"

Well, the lawyer looked puzzled. He took several hours, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls trying to find the answer. Finally, angry and frustrated, he gave up and paid the blonde $50.00

The blonde put the $50 into her purse without comment, but the lawyer insisted, "What is the answer to your question?"

Without saying a word, the blonde handed him $5.

NSFW: Can you believe she's actually 65years old?

2007-08-04T20:40:00.000+08:00

I recieve this on my email a few days back.
Honestly I wanna be like her when I'm 65. =)

NDP (rehearsal) Fireworks photos..

2007-07-15T02:05:00.000+08:00

Only photos, no captions, I'm so tired uploading videos and photos.

Who is clever ? Teacher or student??

2007-07-11T07:17:00.000+08:00

One Night 4 College Students Were Playing Till Late Night And Didn't Study For The Test Which Was Scheduled For The Next Day.

In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look asdirty and weird with grease and dirt. They then went up to the Dean and said that they had gone out to a wedding last night and on their return the tyre of their car burst and they had to push the car all the wayback and that they were in no condition to appear for the test.

So the Dean said they can have the re-test after 3 days. They thanked him and said they will be ready by that time. On the third day they appeared before the Dean. The Dean said that as this was a Special Condition Test, All four were required to sit inseperate classrooms for the test. They all agreed as they had prepared well in the last 3 days.

The Test consisted of 2 questions with the total of 100 Marks.

Q.1. Your Name.........................( 2 MARKS )
Q.2. Which tyre burst ?...............( 98 MARKS )
a) Front Left b)Front Right c) Back Left d) Back Right .....!!!

True story from IIT Bombay...

Stone age internet!!!

2007-07-11T06:50:00.000+08:00

if you stick that...

2007-06-12T00:17:00.000+08:00

Little April was not the best student in Sunday school.
Usually she slept through the class.

One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?"

When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep.

A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. 'JESUS CHRIST!" shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep.

Then the teacher asked April a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time April jumped up and shouted, "IF YOU STICK THAT F*****G THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR ARSE!"

The Teacher fainted.

Prisoner escaped

2007-06-12T00:15:00.000+08:00

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped prisoner, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

The Cucumber, Pickle and Penis

2007-06-12T00:12:00.000+08:00

A cucumber, a pickle, and a penis were all sitting around one day talking about how much their lives sucked.

The cucumber said, "Man, my lifesucks. Whenever I get big, fat, and juicy, someone cuts me up and puts me in a salad."

"So," the pickle looks at him and says, "You think you have it bad? Whenever I get big, fat, and juicy, someone puts me in vinegar, puts spices on me, and sticks me in a jar."

The penis glared at them both and said, "You guys think you have it rough? Whenever I get big, fat, and juicy, they put a rubber tarp over my head, stick me in a dark room, and bang my head against the wall until I throw up and pass out."

Low sperm count

2007-06-12T00:09:00.000+08:00

A 70 year old man went to his doctor's office to get a sperm count.
The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring me back a sample tomorrow."

The next day the 70 year old man reappears at the doctor's office and gives him the jar, which is as clean and empty as on - the previous day.

The doctor asked what happened and the man explains: "Well, doc, it's like this: First I tried with my right hand, but, nothing. Then I tried with-my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She - tried with her right hand, with nothing. Then her left, but nothing. She - even tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with the teeth-out, and still nothing. We even called up the lady next door and-she tried with both hands and her mouth too, but nothing." The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?" the old man replied, "yep, but no matter what we tried we couldn't get the DARN jar open!"

Mailman's last day

2007-06-12T00:07:00.000+08:00

It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.

When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope.

At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars.

The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee.

She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door, and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced.

When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast, eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh squeezed orange juice.

When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee.

As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge. "All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar for?"

"Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you."

He said, "Fuck him, give him a dollar."

The lady then said, "The breakfast was my idea."

what cuss words really mean..

2007-06-12T00:05:00.000+08:00

The mom calls the husband a "bastard"
and then the dad calls the wife a "bitch"
and billy goes to his mom and says "mom what's a bitch and a bastard?"
and the mom says "well, a bitch is a lady and a bastard is a gentlemen"

and then later billy goes outside and hears his neighbors, and hears "Put your penis in my vagina!"
So Billy goes to his mom and says "mom whats a penis and vagina?"
His moms says "Well Billy, a penis is a hat and a vagina is a coat"

and then later billy sees his dad shaving and cuts himself and says "Shit"
and billy said "Dad, whats shit"
And then his dad says
"Well billy, Shit is a type of Shaving cream "

and then billy goes to see his mom cutting the turkey and his mom cuts her finger and says "fuck!"
and then billy says to his mom "Mom whats fuck?"
"Well billy fuck is a way cutting the turkey"

and Then later the guests arrive and billy goes to them and says
"Hello bitches and bastards, may i take your penis's and vaginas,
my dad's upstairs wiping the shit off his face, and my mom is in the kitchen fucking the Turkey"

Why Condoms come in boxes of 3, 6 and 12………

2007-06-12T00:03:00.000+08:00

A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year old son. They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, “What are these, Dad?

To which the man matter-of-factly replies, “Those are called condoms, son. Men use them to have safe sex.”

“Oh I see,” replied the boy pensively. Yes, I’ve heard of that in health class at school.” He looks over the display and picks up a package of 3 and asks, “Why are there 3 in this package?”

The dad replies, “Those are for high school boys, ONE for Friday, ONE for Saturday, and ONE for Sunday.”

“Cool” says the boy. He notices a 6 pack and asks, “Then who are these for?”

“Those are for college men,” the dad answers, TWO for Friday, TWO for Saturday, and TWO for Sunday.”

“WOW!” exclaimed the boy, “then who uses THESE?” he asks, picking up a 12 pack.

With a sigh and a tear in his eye, the dad replied, “Those are for married men. ONE for January, ONE for February, ONE for March…..”

Things Men Say

2007-06-12T00:01:00.000+08:00

"I'M GOING FISHING"
Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."

"IT'S A GUY THING"
Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical".

"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR..."
Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Means: "I have no idea how it works."

"I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."
Means: "I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra."

"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD".
Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
Means: "Are you still talking?"

"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."

"I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES".
Means: "The girl selling them on the corner had great tits."

"OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Means: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."

"HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING".
Means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."

"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."

"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Means: "What did you catch me at?"

"I HEARD YOU."
Means: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me."

"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE"
Means: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."

"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC"
Means: "Please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."

"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Means: "No one will ever see us alive again."

"WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK"
Means: "I make the messes, she cleans them up."

TWISTER SPOTTED In Singapore

2007-05-26T11:15:00.000+08:00

Sharon send me these thru email yesterday..

when you don't know how to answer your MCQ on OAS..

2007-05-18T17:10:00.000+08:00

Innovative advertisement in other countries.

2007-05-11T01:50:00.000+08:00

An innovative idea on a large billboard in Amsterdam, Netherlands. It really makes you want that 'Heineken'.

This is a great advertisment campaign at Unicenter Shopping Mall in Buenos Aires, Argentina for Valentine's Day. It magnifies the romantic ambience with a simple idea.

Life-size stickers of people were stuck on automatic sliding doors at a mall in Mumbai, India. When someone approaches the doors move apart and it feels like the people on the door are moving away. The person enters to find the message 'People Move Away When You Have Body Odour'.

An ambient exercise to promote Eatalica burgers. A 'Caution Wet Floor' board was placed near an Eatalica burger signboard. The copy on the board reads 'Oogling at the burger may involuntarily cause drooling which may in turn lead to a wet floor. Issued for your safety by the management of Eatalica restaurant'. Eatalica is an American-Italian Food Joint in Chennai, India.

A giant mirror was built that allowed passersby to stop and look at themselves wearing Indivi clothes at a shopping mall in Tokyo, Japan

An advertisement for a job recruiting company in Berlin, Germany. Depicting people working in the vending machines, ATMs, it delivers the message that 'Life is too short for the wrong job'.

Stickers were placed in selected car park locations and car workshops where the product is sold in Malaysia. It delivers the message that M-Tech Plasma HID Lights are 300% brighter than regular headlights. The burn effect sticker from the headlights really leaves an impression.

Life size images were stuck on glass doors at shops, airports in South Africa for the advertisement of glass and window cleaner I.C.U. The expression on the face is priceless.

Another creative idea by The Fitness Company. Heavy Weights were placed at various subways in New York City which creates an illusion that the person holding the safety bar is doing weights.

A very cost-effective advertisement in Hong Kong for a yoga school. It showcases the prowess of a yoga practitioner on the flexible stems of drink straws. A surge of enquiries and enrollment went after up this promotional stunt.

This is a creative ad by Mini Cooper placed at the Zurich, Switzerland train station. It gives the perception that the Mini Cooper has a large space.

Really sway!

2007-05-11T01:40:00.000+08:00

Car upside down in the bay - see guy standing on it?
Call out the wrecker!

Coming back up...coming...coming

...almost there!

Ooops!

Time to get a Bigger Wrecker!

Ok, we got the car...let's get the other wrecker now!

O...O...oohhh No!!

Peter Ho Yun-tung 何潤东 @ Bugis

2007-05-06T02:15:00.000+08:00

More blonde jokes

2007-05-03T16:55:00.000+08:00

1) This blonde girl was sitting at her kitchen table trying to figure out a jigsaw puzzle. she calls one of her friends for help, she says that there is a tiger on the box but the pieces dont seem to match at all. her friend gets there and says thats not a puzzle those are frosted flakes.

2) A blonde enters a TV and appliance store and tells the salesperson she wanted to buy a TV.
The salesperson said, "I'm sorry but we don't sell TVs to blondes."
She was upset and left immediately.
She came back two hours later with a wig on and tried to buy the TV again.

The salesperson said, "I'm sorry but we don't sell TVs to blondes."
She was furious now and hatched a plot up to buy the TV.

She waited a month and died her hair a dark brown. She went in again and made sure to get a different salesperson. She said to him, "I'll take that TV right there!"
The salesperson said, "I'm sorry but we don't sell TVs to blondes."
The blonde retorted, "How can you tell I'm blonde?"
The salesperson smiled and said, "Because that's a microwave."

3) 3 girls break into a shop at night - a blonde, a brunette, and an auburn girl. As they're robbing stuff they suddenly hear the siren and see flashing lights, so they decide to hide in the 3 sacks in the corner. One labelled cats, one dogs and one potatoes. The blonde heads for the potato sack, the brunette for the cat sack and the auburn girl to the dog sack. The police come in and they start looking around and they come across the 3 sacks. So one officer takes out his baton and taps the cat sack, and the brunette says "Miaow!". He taps the dog back and the auburn girl says "Woof!". He tapped the potato sack and the blonde says "Potato!".

4) A blonde boards a flight to Rome and settles herself down in first class. Sometime after take off the airline staff realise that she should be travelling economy. The flight attendant approaches and points out the error. "I don't see a problem" says the blonde "No one else is sitting here." The flight attendant tried to get her to see reason but the blonde refused to move.

A second attendant then tried to convince the blonde to move to economy but she continued to refuse. After many futile attempts and efforts of the flight attendants and co pilot; the pilot said "Ok leave it to me; my wife is blonde, I'll handle this."

The staff watched in amazement as the pilot approached the blonde and following a short conversation she got up and moved into economy. "How on earth did you do that?" The co pilot wanted to know. The pilot answered "I told her first class doesn't go to Rome"!

5) Two blonde girls were working for the city public works department. One would dig a hole and the other would follow behind her and fill the hole in. They worked up one side of the street, then down the other, then moved on to the next street, working furiously all day without rest, one girl digging a hole, the other girl filling it in again.

An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing.

So he said to the hole digger, "I'm impressed by the effort you two are putting into your work, but I don't get it - why do you dig a hole, only to have your partner follow behind and fill it up again?"

The hole digger wiped her brow and sighed, "Well, I suppose it probably looks odd because we're normally a three-person team. But today the girl who plants the trees called in sick."

Blonde jokes

2007-05-03T16:50:00.000+08:00

1) A blonde and her brunette friend are driving down the road in the desert. They see a blonde in a row boat out in the middle of the sand. She is trying to row her self through the sand. The brunette looks at her blonde friend and says, "Now see, that is why you blondes are made fun of". The blonde replies, "Your right, and if I could swim I go out there and slap her".

2) What is a brunette in between two blondes?
An interpeter.

3) A blonde, brunnette and red head worked in an office together. They were always mad because their boss would leave early every day and she expected them to stay and keep working. One day they all decided to leave early after their boss was gone. The brunnette took the time to take a nice bath before her kids got home. The red head spent time at the mall. The blonde went home to spend time with her husband, but when she got home she heard noises in the bedroom. She peaked in to see her husband was in bed with her boss. She quickly left the house and didn't come back until her regular time to be home.
The next day the brunnette and red head decided to leave early again. They asked the blonde why she wasn't going to leave early. She replied "No way, I almost got caught yesturday!"

4) A blonde and brunette are watching the 11 o'clock news. A story about a man on a bridge who is threatening to jump comes on. The brunnette says, "I'll bet you $10 bucks he jumps." The blonde replies, "Your on." Sure enough the man jumps. The blonde tries to give the brunnette the $10. The brunnette says, "I can't take your money, I watched the 5 o'clock news and knew he was going to jump." The blonde replies with, "You have to take it, I watched the 5 o'clock news too, but didn't think he would do it again!"

5) Three blondes and a brunnette were rock climbing. Some grappling hooks gave way and left them all dangling on the side of the mountain. They all agreed that it was too much weight on the hooks that were left and one of them should let go to save the rest. No one volunteered at first, then the brunnette started giving a speech about how she would let go and save the rest. It was so touching that the blondes all applauded!

6) A woman is on a walk and comes across a river. She cannot find a way across and there is no bridge. However, there is someone on the other side, a blonde. So the first woman asks, "How do you get to the other side of the river," To which the blonde replies, "You're already on the other side."

7) This next blonde is in the shower. She cannot seem to find the shampoo, so she calls to her boyfriend, "Steve, where's the shampoo?" "It's on the second shelf inside the cubicle." "I knew that one was there, but it's for dry hair. Mine's wet."

8) Then there was a large group of blondes, who rush into a bar excitedly chanting, "Fifty-one, fifty-one, fifty-one!" One of the revelers goes up to the bar to order the drinks. The bartender asks, "Why are your friends chanting fifty-one?" "Well," explains the blonde, "It took us just fifty-one days to complete a jigsaw." "That's not very impressive!" "It is considering the box said two to four years."

Kid friendly jokes

2007-05-03T16:45:00.000+08:00

1) What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
Rufffff!

2) What do you call a pig who knows karate?
A Pork-Chop!

3)Why do giraffes have long necks?
Because they have smelly feet!

4) What did the teddy bear say when the monkey offered him dessert?
No thanks, I'm stuffed!

5) What did the chicken say to the farmer?
Nothing! A chicken can't talk!

6) What do you call 100 bunnies jumping backwards?
A receding hare-line!

7) Why does a hummingbird hum?
It doesn't know the words!

8) What did the judge say when the skunk walked into court?
Odor in the court!

9) What is gray, has big ears and a trunk?
A mouse going on vacation!

10) What's the difference between a piano and a fish?
You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish!

Jokes that kids find funny

2007-05-03T16:35:00.000+08:00

What's brown and sticky?
A stick.

What's black and white and read all over?
A newspaper.

What goes white black white black white black?
A nun rolling down a hill.

What goes from green to red with the flick of a switch?
A frog in a blender.

What's the height of cheekiness?
Throwing a brick through a window then asking for it back.

What goes peck peck bang peck peck bang?
A chicken in a minefield.

Get those nuts

2007-05-03T16:30:00.000+08:00

Late one night two grave diggers were working late filling in a grave from an earlier funeral that took place at dusk. The town Reverend had paid them to stay afterword and finish till it was done.

Old Joe and Hank had almost finished the job and stopped to comment on how lovely the moonlit sky was that evening.

"Say, while we are just standin' here" remarked Joe, "Lets count up what the Revernt paid us for this job". Hank agreed. It was time for a break anyway.
"He couldn't pay us in full with cash, so he left us some sorta exotic nuts!"
Seeing as how they didn't get to eat any exotic foods - they were fine with the arrangement.

Joe started to count out of the jar one at a time "one for you, one for me, one for you , one for me", till suddenly he dropped the jar! Two nuts escaped and rolled down the slope beside them and hit the fence and stopped there.

About this time a boy on a bike came riding up the fence row. As he peered around he saw a man coming up the lane towards him. He soon recognized the man in the moonlight as the town reverend.

"Boy, what in the world are you doin' out here!?" exclaimed the Reverend. "Well I was riding my bike out here pastor to see if'n I could see the ghost of the cemetery." replied the young man.

"Hogwash, son!" the Reverend responded. "Thats just a story the older kids tell the young kids at school..."

And at this moment a strange voice not far from them cried out :
"OK I'll go down and get those 2 nuts by the fence and then we can finish fillin' in this grave!"

They say the good Reverend made it back to town before the boy on the bike did.

GIRL VOCABULARY

2007-05-03T16:25:00.000+08:00

Ever wonder what a girl is REALLY trying to say? Maybe this will help.

FINE:
This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks, this will cause you to have one of those arguments.

FIVE MINUTES:
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.

NOTHING:
This means "something", and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with "Fine".

GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows):
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine".

GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows):
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care" You will get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

LOUD SIGH:
This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".

SOFT SIGH:
Again, not a word, but a non-verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content.

THAT'S OKAY:
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a "Raised Eyebrow.

GO AHEAD:
At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.

PLEASE DO:
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful, and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay."

THANKS:
A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say you're welcome.

THANKS A LOT:
This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Nothing."

Parrot's Prayers

2007-05-03T15:40:00.000+08:00

This is the one about a Catholic lady and her parrot. It seems that every time someone entered her house the parrot yelled out 'Hello big boy - fancy a good time?'

She decided to discuss this problem with her priest. He told her that he too had a parrot. Only his was a deeply religious bird who only said his prayers and played with his rosary beads. The priest suggested that the two parrots should meet and perhaps his bird might have a positive influence over hers.

A meeting was set up and she took hers to the priests house. As expected the holy bird was muttering in a prayer like way and playing with his rosary beads.

As soon as the ladies parrot saw the priest's, true to form she shrieked 'Hello big boy - fancy a good time?'. The priest's parrot visibly smiled. He went up to him and said 'Why are you so pleased with yourself?' His parrot looked him in the eye and said 'My prayers have been answered!'.

Song of the year 2006: My Cubicle

2007-05-03T13:50:00.000+08:00

The lyrics to the song to be sung in the tune of "You're Beautiful" by James Blunt.

My job is stupid,
My day's a bore,
Inside this office,
From 8 to 4.

Nothing ever happens,
My life is pretty blank,
Pretending that I am working,
Pray I don't get canned.

My cubicle, my cubicle,
It's 1 of 62,
It's my small space,
In a crowded place,
Just a six by six board booth,
And I hate it, that's the truth.

When I give a sigh,
As the boss walks by,
No one ever talks to me,
Or looks me in the eye,
And I really should work,
But instead I just sit here,
And surf the internet.

And my cubicle, my cubicle,
It doesn't have a view,
It's my small space,
In a crowded place,
I sit inside there too,
And sometimes I sit here nude.

Don't eat chicken, no matter what......

2007-05-03T13:45:00.000+08:00

A little boy and a little girl attended the same school and became friends.*
Every day they would sit together to eat their lunch. They discovered that they both brought chicken sandwiches every day!

This went on all through the fourth and fifth grades, until one day he noticed that her sandwich wasn't a chicken sandwich.
He said, "Hey, how come you're not eating chicken, don't you like it anymore?"
She said "I love it but I have to stop eating it."
"Why?" he asked.

She pointed to her lap and said "Cause I'm starting to grow little feathers down there!"
"Let me see" he said.
"Okay" and she pulled up her skirt.
He looked and said, "That's right. You are!
*Better not eat any more chicken."*

He kept eating his chicken sandwiches until one day he brought peanut butter.
He said to the little girl, "I have to stop eating chicken sandwiches, I'm starting to get feathers down there too!"

She asked if she could look, so he pulled down his pants for her.
She said "Oh, my God, it's too late for you!
You've already got the neck and the gizzards!!!

Noodle v Bao

2007-05-03T13:40:00.000+08:00

This joke is hilariously funny! But I suppose you have to be chinese to
comprehend it.

*Chapter One*
One day, noodle quarrel with meat bao (bun). They had a fight but bao was
too clumsy and lost badly. He was very angry and he told noodle to stay
behind if he has the guts and he'll get his pals to assist him.

Meat bao went to find bread, man tou, jian bao etc to get them to reinforce
him. Along the way, they saw maggi mee. They ah bish ah bish ah bish and
beat maggi mee up and maggi mee was beri puzzled why he kena beaten up.

He said, "Why u all beat me? What have I done to deserve this?"

The meat bao said, "Noodle! Dun think u perm your hair then we cannot
recognise u!"

*Chapter Two*

Maggi mee, who was beaten up for no reason, was very angry. So he went to
find bee hoon, udon, fried noodles etc to seek revenge.

But on the way, they met small bao. Maggi mee looked at small bao for a
while then told his brothers, "Bra-der! Whack him!" Maggi mee whack small
bao harder & harder.

After the noodles family has left, they asked Maggi Mee why he hated small
bao so much and beat him up so badly.

Maggi mee said. "At first wanna teach him a small lesson only, but then see
him act cute, made me so angry."

*Chapter Three*

The more small bao thought of it, the more buay song he was. So, he found
the bao family to whack Maggi mee.

Then they found ying shi juan (noodles covered with bun). They brought him
back as hostage and were about to put him on the stove to force him to talk
when the bao head said, "That's not noodles! That's our undercover!"

*Chapter Four*

The family of bao and noodles are now enemies and they have gang fights
whenever they see each other. One day, the noodles family was having a walk
when they saw char siew bao alone.

Seeing the good chance, all of them attacked him. The noodles family
shouted, "Beat him hard hard! Don't give chance just because he's vomiting
blood!"

*Chapter Five*

Poor char siew bao, with his injuries, went to the bao headquarters to look
for help. All the bao family was activated and together with red bean bao,
green bean bun etc. they went to seek revenge. All the passerbys siam them
as they look like they will kill.

They saw french fries jalan jalan along, shopping. The bao family attacked
him. The bao head shouted, "Noodle people still wear gold go shopping! Whack
him!!!"

*Chapter Six*

Finally, the bao family manage to kidnap noodle, the one who started up the
whole show, and brought him back to the bao headquarter.

All the baos took turns to whack him. At the end, the chief of baos - dua
bah bao took a final roll over noodle before they dump him.

When the poor noodle finally went home, none of the family member could
recognise him bcoz he is totally disfigured - flatten. In order not to let
the family bear the bad name, he appears as a new member named mee pok.

"GOLDEN" Exam Papers

2007-05-03T13:32:00.000+08:00

Creative art on trucks!

2007-04-30T23:53:00.000+08:00

Here are 7 pictures of (European) semi-trucks whose trailers are decorated
to look like the sides are missing and the products they are hauling are
painted on the sides and back. *

The first one is of a bottle of beer and looks so real, like it is coming
out the side of the trailer.

The second is of canvas tote bag.

The third is of Pepsi cases and they are all stacked on the ceiling, and the
bottom of the trailer is empty.

The fourth is of another truck with the windshield facing the back and there
has been a driver painted in the driver's seat looking back over his
shoulder to appear like he is driving backwards.

The fifth one is of an aquarium with fish swimming in it.

The sixth one is of a bookshelf with books lined up in it and a post-it-note
with an advertisement on it, probably for the company that sells the books.
(Again, in a foreign language)

The last one is for Pringles-Hot & Spicy. The "inside" of the trailer has
the appearance of having been through a fire.

Chinese Proverb:
"When someone shares something of value with you and you benefit from it,
you have a moral obligation to share it with others."

Deeper meaning to the 3 little words we take for granted..

2007-04-26T03:55:00.000+08:00

Some of the most significant messages people deliver to one another often come in just three words. When spoken or conveyed, those statements have the power to forge new friendships, deepen old ones and restore relationships that have cooled. The following three-word phrases can enrich every relationship.
------------------------------------------------------------

I'LL BE THERE - Being there for another person
is the greatest gift we can give. When we are truly
present for other people, important things happen
to them and to us. We are renewed in love and
friendship. We are restored emotionally and
spiritually. 'Being there' is at the very very core of
civility.
------------------------------------------------------------

I MISS YOU - Perhaps more marriages could be
salvaged and strengthened if couples simply and
sincerely said to each other, "I miss you." This
powerful affirmation tells partners they are
wanted, needed, desired and loved.
------------------------------------------------------------

I RESPECT YOU - Respect is another way of
showing love. Respect conveys the feeling that
another person is a true equal. It is a powerful
way to affirm the importance of a relationship.
------------------------------------------------------------

MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT - This phrase is highly
effective in diffusing an argument and restoring
frayed emotions. The flip side of "maybe you're
right" is the humility of admitting "maybe I'm
wrong."
------------------------------------------------------------

PLEASE FORGIVE ME - Many broken
relationships could be restored and healed if
people would admit their mistakes and ask for
forgiveness. All of us are vulnerable to faults, foibles and
failures. A man should never be ashamed to own
he has been in the wrong, which is but saying, in
other words, that he is wiser today than he was
yesterday.
------------------------------------------------------------

I THANK YOU - Gratitude is an exquisite form of
courtesy. People who enjoy the companionship of
good, close friends are those who don't take daily
courtesies for granted. They are quick to thank
their friends for their many expressions of
kindness. On the other hand, people whose circle
of friends is severely constricted often do not
have the attitude of gratitude.
------------------------------------------------------------

COUNT ON ME - "A friend is one who walks in
when others walk out," Loyalty is an essential
ingredient for true friendship; it is the emotional
glue that bonds people. Those who are rich in
their relationships tend to be steady and true friends.
When troubles come, a good friend is there,
indicating "you can count on me."
------------------------------------------------------------

LET ME HELP - The best of friends see a need
and try to fill it. When they spot a hurt they do what
they can to heal it. Without being asked, they
pitch in and help.
------------------------------------------------------------

I UNDERSTAND YOU - People become closer
and enjoy each other more if they feel the other person
accepts and understands them. Letting others
know in so many little ways that you understand
him or her is one of the most powerful tools for
healing your relationship.
------------------------------------------------------------

GO FOR IT - Some of your friends may be non
conformists, have unique projects and unusual
hobbies. Support them in pursuing their interests.
Rather than urging your loved ones to conform,
encourage their uniqueness-everyone has
dreams that no one else has.
------------------------------------------------------------

I suppose the 3 little words that you were
expecting to see have to be reserved for those
who are special; that is I LOVE YOU.
Have a great day loving yourself and loving your
loved ones!

Roses every year..

2007-04-24T00:50:00.000+08:00

Each year he sent her roses,
and the note would always say,
I love you even more this year,
than last year on this day.
My love for you will always grow,
with every passing year."

She knew this was the last time
that the roses would appear.
She thought, he ordered roses
in advance before this day.
Her loving husband did not know,
that he would pass away.

He always liked to do things early,
way before the time.
Then, if he got too busy,
everything would work out fine.

She trimmed the stems and
placed them in a very special vase.
Then, sat the vase beside
the portrait of his smiling face.

She would sit for hours,
In her husband's favorite chair.
While staring at his picture,
and the roses sitting there.

A year went by, and it was
to live without her mate.
With loneliness and solitude,
that had become her fate.

Then, the very hour,
The doorbell rang, and there
were roses sitting by her door.

She brought the roses in,
and then just looked at them in shock.
Then, went to get the telephone,
to call the florist shop.

The owner answered, and she asked him,
if he would explain, Why would someone would
do this to her, causing her such pain?

"I know your husband passed away,
more than a year ago,"
The owner said,
"I knew you'd call, and you would want to know.
The flowers you received today,
were paid for in advance.
Your husband always planned ahead,
he left nothing to chance.
There is a standing order,
that I have on file down here,
And he has paid, well in advance,
you'll get them every year.

There also is another thing,
that I think you should know,
He wrote a special little card...he did this years ago.
Then, should ever I find out that he's no longer here, that's the card that should be sent to you
the following year."

She thanked him and hung up the phone, her tears now flowing hard.
Her fingers shaking,
as she slowly reached to get the card.

Inside the card, she saw that he had written her a note.
Then, as she stared in total silence,
this is what he wrote...

"Hello my love, I know it's been a year
since I've been gone.
I hope it hasn't been too hard for you to overcome.
I know it must be lonely,
and the pain is very real.

Or if it was the other way,
I know how I would feel.
The love we shared made everything
so beautiful in life.
I loved you more than words can say,
you were the perfect wife.
You were my friend and lover,
you fulfilled my every need.
I know it's only been a year,
but please try not to grieve.

I want you to be happy,
even when you shed your tears.
That is why the roses will be sent to you for years.
When you get these roses,
think of all the happiness that we had together,
and how both of us were blessed.
I have always loved you and
I know I always will.
But, my love, you must go on,
you have some living still.

Please...try to find happiness,
while living out your days.
I know it is not easy,
but I hope you find some ways.

The roses will come every year,
and they will only stop,
When your door's not answered,
when the florist stops to knock.
He will come five times that day,
in case you have gone out.
But after his last visit,
he will know without a doubt!
To take the roses to the place,
where I've instructed him
and place the roses where we are,
together once again.

Sometimes in life, you find a special friend;
Someone who changes your life
just by being part of it.
Someone who makes you laugh
until you can't stop;
Someone who makes you believe
that there really is good in the world.
Someone who convinces you
that there really is an unlocked door
just waiting for you to open it.

26 Funny Things To Do In An Elevator

2007-04-24T00:45:00.000+08:00

http://cwkhang.blogspot.com/2007/04/26-funny-things-to-do-in-elevator.html

Princess who melts everything..

2007-04-24T00:10:00.000+08:00

Once upon a time there lived a king.
The king had a beautiful daughter, the PRINCESS.

But there was a problem. Everything the princess touched would melt.
No matter what; metal, wood, stone, Anything she touched would melt.

Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her.
The king despaired. What could he do to help his daughter?

He consulted his wizards and magicians. One wizard told the king, "If your daughter touches one thing that does not melt in her hands, she will be cured."

The king was overjoyed and came up with a plan next day, he held a competition. Any man that could bring his daughter an object that would not melt would marry her and inherit the king's wealth.

THREE YOUNG PRINCES TOOK UP THE CHALLENGE.

The first brought a sword of the finest steel.
But alas, when the princess touched it, it melted, and the prince went away sadly.

The second prince brought diamonds.
He thought diamonds are the hardest substance in the world and would not melt. But alas, once the princess touched them, they melted. He too was sent away disappointed.

:-[

The third prince approached. He told the princess, "Put your hand in my pocket and feel what is in there." The princess did as she was told, though she turned red.

She felt something hard. She held it in her hand.
And it did not melt!!!

The king was overjoyed. Everybody in the kingdom was overjoyed. And the third prince married the princess and they both lived happily ever after.

Question: What was in the prince's pants?

(Scroll down for the answer)
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.
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.
.

M&M's.
They melt in your mouth, not in your hand.

What were you thinking??
U Very Hum Sap Loh!

A dumb girl.

2007-04-23T23:58:00.000+08:00

I knew a girl that was so stupid that.......

1) she called me to get my phone number.
2) she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate."
3) she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.
4) she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.
5) she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
6) she tried to drown a fish.
7) she thought a quarterback was a refund.
8) she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.
9) she tripped over a cordless phone.
10) she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
11) she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.
12) she studied for a blood test.
13) she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.
14) when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.
15) when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead.
16) when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home!

Did you know ???

2007-04-20T00:59:00.000+08:00

Did you know that when you envy someone, it's because you really like that person?

Did you know that those who appear to be very strong in heart, are real weaklings and most succeptible?

Did you know that those who spend their time protecting others are the ones that really need some one to protect them?

Did you know that the three most difficult things to say are : I love you, Sorry and help me?
The people who say these are that actually need them or really feel them, and are the ones you really need to treasure, because they have said them.

Did you know that people who occupy themselves by keeping others company or helping others are the ones that actually need your company and help?

Did you know that those who dress in red are more confidence in themselves?

Did you know that those who dress in yellow are those that enjoy their beauty?

Did you know that those who dress in black, are those who want to be unnoticed and need your help and understanding?

Did you know that when you help someone, the help is returned in two folds?

Did you know that those who need more of you are those that not mention it to you?

Did you know that it's easier to say what you feel in writting than saying it to someone in the face? But did you know that it has more value when you say it in the face?

Did you know that what is most difficult for you to say or do is much more valuable than anything that is valuable that you can buy with money?

Did you know that if you ask for something in faith, your wishes are granted?

Did you know that you can make your dreams come true, like falling in love, becoming rich, staying healthy, if you ask for it by faith, and if you really knew, you'd be surprised by what you could do.

How Much Your Friendship Can Mean to Someone

2007-04-20T00:55:00.000+08:00

One day, when I was a freshman inhigh school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school. His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books.

I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd."

I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.

As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him.

He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him and as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye.

As I handed him his glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives. He looked at me and said,"Hey thanks!" There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.

I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.

We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends.
He said yes.

We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.

Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again. I stopped him and said, "Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!"He just laughed and handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends. When we were seniors, we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown, and I was going to Duke. I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor, and I was going for business on a football scholarship.

Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation. I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak.

Graduation day, I saw Kyle.
He looked great. He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous. Today was one of those days.

I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, "Hey, big guy, you'll be great!" He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled. "Thanks," he said.

As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began.

"Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach... but mostly your friends...I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story."

I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.

He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. "Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable."

I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment. I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions.
With one small gesture you can change a person's life.

For better or for worse
God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in some way.

Friends (Teddy)

2007-04-20T00:53:00.000+08:00

Why Women Cry

2007-04-19T23:38:00.000+08:00

Why are you crying, a young boy asked his Mom?

"Because I'm a woman," she told him.

"I don't understand," he said.

His Mom just hugged him and said,
"And you never will, but that's O.K.".......

Later the little boy asked his father,
"Why does Mom seem to cry for no reason?".
"All women cry for no reason," was all his Dad could say......

The little boy grew up and became a man,
still wondering why women cry.

Finally he put in a call to God and when God got back to him, he asked "God, why do women cry so easily?"

GOD answered......

"When I made woman,
I decided she had to be special.
I made her shoulders
strong enough to carry
the weight of the world, yet,
made her arms gentle enough to give comfort... !

I gave her the inner strength
to endure childbirth
and the rejection
that many times will come
even from her own children.

I gave her a hardness
that allows her
to keep going and take care
of her family and friends,
even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue without
complaining....

I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all
circumstances. Even when her child has hurt her badly....

She has the very special power to make a child's boo-boo feel better and
to quell a teenager's anxieties and fears....

I gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faults
and I fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart....

I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but
sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him
unfalteringly....

For all of this hard work,
I also gave her a tear to shed.
It is hers to use
whenever needed and
it is her only weakness....
When you see her cry,
tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even though
she may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good.

KINDNESS Pays !

2007-04-19T23:33:00.000+08:00

One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay

his way through school, found he had only one thin dime left, and

he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next

house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened

the door. Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water.... She

thought he looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk. He

drank it slowly, and then asked, "How much do I owe you?"

"You don't owe me anything," she replied. "Mother has taught us

never to accept payment for a kindness."

He said... "Then I thank you from my heart."

As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger

physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had

been ready to give up and quit.

Years later that young woman became critically ill. The local

doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where

they called in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr. Howard

Kelly was called in for the consultation. When he heard the name of

the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes.

Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her

room.

Dressed in his doctor's gown he went in to see her. He recognized

her at once. He went back to the consultation room determined to do

his best to save her life. From that day he gave special attention

to the case.

After a long struggle, the battle was won.

Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to

him for approval. He looked at it, then wrote something on the edge

and the bill was sent to her room.... She feared to open it, for

she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all.

Finally, she looked, and something caught her attention on the side

as She read these words.....

"Paid in full with one glass of milk." (Signed) Dr. Howard Kelly.

Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart prayed: "Thank

You, GOD, that Your love has spread abroad through human hearts and

hands."

To Realize

2007-04-19T23:31:00.000+08:00

To realize
The value of a sister
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.

To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.

To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.

To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.

To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a still born.

To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother
who has given birth to
A premature baby.

To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize
The value of one hour:
Ask the lovers who are waiting to Meet.

To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.

To realize
The value of one-second:
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident...

To realize
The value of one millisecond:
Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics

Time waits for no one.

Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
you can share it with someone special.

To realize the value of a friend:
Lose one.

Why Worry?

2007-04-19T23:25:00.000+08:00

There are only two things in life to worry about:
Whether you are well or whether you are sick.

If you are well, then there is nothing to worry about.

But if you are sick, there are only two things to worry about:
Whether you are going to get well or whether you are going to die.

If you get well, then there is nothing to worry about.

But if you die, there are only two things to worry about:
Whether you are going to go to heaven or whether you are going to go to hell.

If you go to heaven, then you have nothing to worry about.

But if you go to hell, you'll be so busy shaking hands with all your friends,
than you won't have time to worry!

So, Why Worry?
Be Happy!

EASY ....... DIFFICULT

2007-04-19T23:21:00.000+08:00

Easy is to get a place is someone's address book.
Difficult is to get a place in someone's heart.

Easy is to judge the mistakes of others
Difficult is to recognize our own mistakes

Easy is to talk without thinking
Difficult is to refrain the tongue

Easy is to hurt someone who loves us.
Difficult is to heal the wound...

Easy is to forgive others
Difficult is to ask for forgiveness

Easy is to set rules.
Difficult is to follow them...

Easy is to dream every night.
Difficult is to fight for a dream...

Easy is to show victory.
Difficult is to assume defeat with dignity...

Easy is to admire a full moon.
Difficult to see the other side...

Easy is to stumble with a stone.
Difficult is to get up...

Easy is to enjoy life every day.
Difficult to give its real value...

Easy is to promise something to someone.
Difficult is to fulfill that promise...

Easy is to say we love.
Difficult is to show it every day...

Easy is to criticize others.
Difficult is to improve oneself...

Easy is to make mistakes.
Difficult is to learn from them...

Easy is to weep for a lost love.
Difficult is to take care of it so not to lose it.

Easy is to think about improving.
Difficult is to stop thinking it and put it into action...

Easy is to think bad of others
Difficult is to give them the benefit of the doubt...

Easy is to receive
Difficult is to give

Easy to read this
Difficult to follow

Easy is keep the friendship with words
Difficult is to keep it with meanings.

Breakfast at McDonald's (UNCONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE)

2007-04-19T23:17:00.000+08:00

This is a good story.

I am a mother of three (ages 14, 12, 3) and have recently completed my college degree.
The last class I had to take was Sociology.

The teacher was absolutely inspiring with the qualities that I wish every human
being had been graced with. Her last project of the term was called "Smile."
The class was asked to go out and smile at three people and document their
reactions.

I am a very friendly person and always smile at everyone and say hello anyway, so, I thought this would be a piece of cake, literally.

Soon after we were assigned the project, my husband, youngest son, and I went out to McDonald's one crisp March morning. It was just our way of sharing special playtime with our son.

We were standing in line, waiting to be served, when all of a sudden everyone around us began to back away, and then ! even my husband did. I did not move an inch... an overwhelming feeling of panic welled up inside of me as I turned to see why they had moved.

As I turned around I smelled a horrible "dirty body" smell, and there standing behind me were two poor homeless men. As I looked down at the short gentleman, close to me, he was "smiling". His beautiful sky blue eyes were full of God's Light as he searched for acceptance.

He said, "Good day" as he counted the few coins he had been clutching.

The second man fumbled with his hands as he stood behind his friend. I realized the second man was mentally challenged and the blue-eyed gentleman was his salvation.

I held my tears as I stood there with them.

The young lady at the counter asked him what they wanted.
He said, "Coffee is all Miss" because that was all they could afford. (If they wanted to sit in the restaurant and warm up, they had to buy something. He just wanted to be warm).

Then I really felt it - the compulsion was so great I almost reached out and embraced the little man with the blue eyes.

That is when I noticed all eyes in the restaurant were set on me, judging my every action.
I smiled and asked the young lady behind the counter to give me two more breakfast meals on a separate tray.

I then walked around the corner to the table that the men had chosen as a resting spot. I put the tray on the table and laid my hand on the blue-eyed gentleman's cold hand.

He looked up at me, with tears in his eyes, and said, "Thank you."

I leaned over, began to pat his hand and said, "I did not do this for you. God is here working through me to give you hope."

I started to cry as I walked away to join my husband and son. When I sat down my husband smiled at me and said, "That is why God gave you to me, Honey, to give me hope."
We held hands for a moment and at that time, we knew that only because of the Grace that we had been given were we able to give.

We are not church goers, but we are believers.
That day showed me the pure Light of God's sweet love.

I returned to college, on the last evening of class, with this story in hand.
I turned in "my project" and the instructor read it.
& Then she looked up at me and said, "Can I share this?"
I slowly nodded as she got the attention of the class.

She began to read and that is when I knew that we as human beings and being part of God share this need to heal people and to be healed.

In my own way I had touched the people at McDonald's, my husband, son, instructor, and every soul that shared the classroom on the last night I spent as a college student.

I graduated with one of the biggest lessons I would ever learn: UNCONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE.

A List to Live by

2007-04-19T23:05:00.000+08:00

The most destructive habit..............................Worry
The greatest Joy.......................................Giving
The greatest loss............................Loss of self-respect

The most satisfying work.......................Helping others
The ugliest personality trait.....................Selfishness

Our greatest natural resource..............Our youth
The greatest "shot in the arm".................Encouragement
The greatest problem to overcome...................Fear

The most effective sleeping pill................Peace of mind
The most crippling failure disease....................Excuses
The most powerful force in life..........................Love

The most dangerous pariah..........................A gossiper
The world's most incredible computer................The brain
The worst thing to be without...................... Hope

The deadliest weapon...........................The tongue
The two most power-filled words......................."I Can"
The most contagious spirit.........................Enthusiasm

The most worthless emotion..........................Self-pity
The most beautiful attire..............................SMILE!
The most prized possession......................... Integrity

Everyone needs this list to live by...

Bra codes

2007-04-19T22:15:00.000+08:00

A Friend Is Like A Good Bra...
Hard to Find
Supportive
Comfortable
Always Lifts You Up
Never Lets You Down or Leaves You Hanging
And Is Always Close To Your Heart!!!

RockYou.com

2007-04-03T14:09:00.000+08:00

This sure is fun!

Pet fishes

2007-03-31T23:00:00.000+08:00

ITE Bishan IQS & Co-op photos

2007-03-08T22:44:00.000+08:00

Kit, Salimah, Diyana, Me, Mandy, Xin Ying, Jack, Aisha & Lela.

Chun Hui, SiokYong, Kit, Ber, Me, Mandy, Kenrick,& Xin Ying.

Chun Hui, SiokYong, Kit, Ber, Me, Mandy, Kenrick,& Xin Ying.

Me and Ber.

Me and lab-partner Salimah.

Me and Xin Ying.

Me and Kit.

Me and sister Lee Leng.

Lee Leng, Ms Lam & Me.

Me and Gan Jun.

Me and Jack. (I have weird eyes..)

Ah ber..

I bought the 6 photos below and scan them in, these are sized down ones. If you want the actual size file, please contact me thru msn. 1 photo is about 5mb. =)

Formal class photo~

Fun shot class photo 1.

Fun shot class photo 2. =)

Formal co-op club photo.

Fun shot co-op club photo 1.

Fun shot co-op club photo 2.

night vivo photos.

2007-01-14T22:12:00.000+08:00

There's a hole!!!

Water's flowing in..

can see? Lynn says it looks like vomit. -.-

arh.. sentosa..

oops.. too blur..

hey!!!

is it???

It is a ship!!!

Gotheborg!!!

the ferry to batam? (Lynn, is it?)

My favorite photo!!! Look the stairs has lights!!!

The road..

blur. :P

Upstairs of Vivo..

I prefer the night vivo man.. =)

Debbie & Mikey's First Christmas in Singapore!

2006-12-07T18:16:00.000+08:00

Vivocity opening fireworks!

2006-12-03T00:32:00.000+08:00

1 Dec 2006 was Vivocity official opening.
They had 10mins of fireworks. and well,it's really very pretty.

This is one of the nicest & clearest photo I had of that fireworks.

So many new designs. But all too fast for me to take.. :'(

This is the best. Looks like gold dust falling down. very pretty and last very very long..

Can see some of the dust?

Very pretty. it's a pity they build the lift which blocked my view. -.-

Arh~ Gold dust.. Fall on me... Fall on me.. :P

whole chunk of photos. (Vivocity, food and others)

2006-11-30T14:55:00.000+08:00

20 photos ahead. Those who prefer long wordy boring blog entries...
Go somewhere else...

I just bought this necklace online for $6.40 including postage. =)

Can open one leh. :P

Teach gave us one.. got Mike's name lols.

I love clouds.

and clear blue skies...

misdemeanor = 行为不端

It's so warm and the kids are still playing...

No little = nice clean place.

Sha Xiao Mei take one..

I take one...

So pretty hanging on "strings"

Concrete oval shaped huge snowman.

It's a pity this place is so HOT! I want to run aroudn in the play ground too. :(

Less sun..

This place is like so empty..

That durain place =P

The tress, the skies, the clouds, the sea... Smells like paradise...

Makes me wanna hug those clouds. :(

Nice boat.. Probably for visitors.. hahas..

3 white Christmas thress. =)

Slanted lamp posts.. how nice. lols.

Can you spot 5 Christmas tress?

Food at Hans..

Mike's food.

Christina's food.

=)

Lazy Fat Chick

Zoo Visit Part 7 (35 Photos) - LAST

Zoo Visit Part 6 (44 Photos)

Zoo Visit Part 5 (38 Photos)

Zoo Visit Part 4 (49 Photos)

Zoo Visit Part 3 (49 Photos)

Zoo Visit Part 2 (26 Photos)

Zoo Visit Part 1 (Camwhore)

Just take care of my eyes please...

Wonders of Makeup.

China Earthquake Comic Strips by Coco Wang

20th Birthday Cake

Jail or Work? (Chinese)

Game: Candybar4 DollMakerGirl by elouai.com

Soup Restaurant at Jurong Point

Christmas Display @ Parkway

Christmas Tree @ Vivocity

Singapore Police Force Recruitment Campaign 2008 at Vivocity

小学生造句

THE BEAUTY OF MATHS.

Game of Intelligence

NSFW: Can you believe she's actually 65years old?

NDP (rehearsal) Fireworks photos..

Who is clever ? Teacher or student??

Stone age internet!!!

if you stick that...

Prisoner escaped

The Cucumber, Pickle and Penis

Low sperm count

Mailman's last day

what cuss words really mean..

Why Condoms come in boxes of 3, 6 and 12………

Things Men Say

TWISTER SPOTTED In Singapore

when you don't know how to answer your MCQ on OAS..

Innovative advertisement in other countries.

Really sway!

Peter Ho Yun-tung 何潤东 @ Bugis

More blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

Kid friendly jokes

Jokes that kids find funny

Get those nuts

GIRL VOCABULARY

Parrot's Prayers

Song of the year 2006: My Cubicle

Don't eat chicken, no matter what......

*Noodle v Bao *

"GOLDEN" Exam Papers

Creative art on trucks!

Deeper meaning to the 3 little words we take for granted..

Roses every year..

26 Funny Things To Do In An Elevator

Princess who melts everything..

A dumb girl.

Did you know ???

How Much Your Friendship Can Mean to Someone

Friends (Teddy)

Why Women Cry

KINDNESS Pays !

To Realize

Why Worry?

EASY ....... DIFFICULT

Breakfast at McDonald's (UNCONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE)

A List to Live by

Bra codes

RockYou.com

Pet fishes

ITE Bishan IQS & Co-op photos

night vivo photos.

Debbie & Mikey's First Christmas in Singapore!

Vivocity opening fireworks!

whole chunk of photos. (Vivocity, food and others)

Noodle v Bao