Thursday, 3 May 2007

More blonde jokes

1) This blonde girl was sitting at her kitchen table trying to figure out a jigsaw puzzle. she calls one of her friends for help, she says that there is a tiger on the box but the pieces dont seem to match at all. her friend gets there and says thats not a puzzle those are frosted flakes.

2) A blonde enters a TV and appliance store and tells the salesperson she wanted to buy a TV.
The salesperson said, "I'm sorry but we don't sell TVs to blondes."
She was upset and left immediately.
She came back two hours later with a wig on and tried to buy the TV again.

The salesperson said, "I'm sorry but we don't sell TVs to blondes."
She was furious now and hatched a plot up to buy the TV.

She waited a month and died her hair a dark brown. She went in again and made sure to get a different salesperson. She said to him, "I'll take that TV right there!"
The salesperson said, "I'm sorry but we don't sell TVs to blondes."
The blonde retorted, "How can you tell I'm blonde?"
The salesperson smiled and said, "Because that's a microwave."

3) 3 girls break into a shop at night - a blonde, a brunette, and an auburn girl. As they're robbing stuff they suddenly hear the siren and see flashing lights, so they decide to hide in the 3 sacks in the corner. One labelled cats, one dogs and one potatoes. The blonde heads for the potato sack, the brunette for the cat sack and the auburn girl to the dog sack. The police come in and they start looking around and they come across the 3 sacks. So one officer takes out his baton and taps the cat sack, and the brunette says "Miaow!". He taps the dog back and the auburn girl says "Woof!". He tapped the potato sack and the blonde says "Potato!".

4) A blonde boards a flight to Rome and settles herself down in first class. Sometime after take off the airline staff realise that she should be travelling economy. The flight attendant approaches and points out the error. "I don't see a problem" says the blonde "No one else is sitting here." The flight attendant tried to get her to see reason but the blonde refused to move.

A second attendant then tried to convince the blonde to move to economy but she continued to refuse. After many futile attempts and efforts of the flight attendants and co pilot; the pilot said "Ok leave it to me; my wife is blonde, I'll handle this."

The staff watched in amazement as the pilot approached the blonde and following a short conversation she got up and moved into economy. "How on earth did you do that?" The co pilot wanted to know. The pilot answered "I told her first class doesn't go to Rome"!

5) Two blonde girls were working for the city public works department. One would dig a hole and the other would follow behind her and fill the hole in. They worked up one side of the street, then down the other, then moved on to the next street, working furiously all day without rest, one girl digging a hole, the other girl filling it in again.

An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing.

So he said to the hole digger, "I'm impressed by the effort you two are putting into your work, but I don't get it - why do you dig a hole, only to have your partner follow behind and fill it up again?"

The hole digger wiped her brow and sighed, "Well, I suppose it probably looks odd because we're normally a three-person team. But today the girl who plants the trees called in sick."

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