Thursday, 3 May 2007

Blonde jokes

1) A blonde and her brunette friend are driving down the road in the desert. They see a blonde in a row boat out in the middle of the sand. She is trying to row her self through the sand. The brunette looks at her blonde friend and says, "Now see, that is why you blondes are made fun of". The blonde replies, "Your right, and if I could swim I go out there and slap her".

2) What is a brunette in between two blondes?
An interpeter.

3) A blonde, brunnette and red head worked in an office together. They were always mad because their boss would leave early every day and she expected them to stay and keep working. One day they all decided to leave early after their boss was gone. The brunnette took the time to take a nice bath before her kids got home. The red head spent time at the mall. The blonde went home to spend time with her husband, but when she got home she heard noises in the bedroom. She peaked in to see her husband was in bed with her boss. She quickly left the house and didn't come back until her regular time to be home.
The next day the brunnette and red head decided to leave early again. They asked the blonde why she wasn't going to leave early. She replied "No way, I almost got caught yesturday!"

4) A blonde and brunette are watching the 11 o'clock news. A story about a man on a bridge who is threatening to jump comes on. The brunnette says, "I'll bet you $10 bucks he jumps." The blonde replies, "Your on." Sure enough the man jumps. The blonde tries to give the brunnette the $10. The brunnette says, "I can't take your money, I watched the 5 o'clock news and knew he was going to jump." The blonde replies with, "You have to take it, I watched the 5 o'clock news too, but didn't think he would do it again!"

5) Three blondes and a brunnette were rock climbing. Some grappling hooks gave way and left them all dangling on the side of the mountain. They all agreed that it was too much weight on the hooks that were left and one of them should let go to save the rest. No one volunteered at first, then the brunnette started giving a speech about how she would let go and save the rest. It was so touching that the blondes all applauded!

6) A woman is on a walk and comes across a river. She cannot find a way across and there is no bridge. However, there is someone on the other side, a blonde. So the first woman asks, "How do you get to the other side of the river," To which the blonde replies, "You're already on the other side."

7) This next blonde is in the shower. She cannot seem to find the shampoo, so she calls to her boyfriend, "Steve, where's the shampoo?" "It's on the second shelf inside the cubicle." "I knew that one was there, but it's for dry hair. Mine's wet."

8) Then there was a large group of blondes, who rush into a bar excitedly chanting, "Fifty-one, fifty-one, fifty-one!" One of the revelers goes up to the bar to order the drinks. The bartender asks, "Why are your friends chanting fifty-one?" "Well," explains the blonde, "It took us just fifty-one days to complete a jigsaw." "That's not very impressive!" "It is considering the box said two to four years."

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